Clothes and Closets

I have been posting much of this at the SOS blog site. It's amazing how a response or two from those lovely ladies along with a rise in the numbers who are reading this can perk one up so considerably. To those of you posting and reading...thank you! Your words, thoughts and prayers mean so much.

How long ago was it that I said, "Let's see how long it takes me to put away the clothes that are out in the living room." Hmmm....I'll have to look it up. But I finally got it done today! Mount WashedMore is no more! It's nice to know what clothes I have available, especially for work. Now, if we could just keep up with the rest of the house...!

Because of putting clothes away and reading a thread at SOS about carpet beetles and larvae, I got motivated to clean out the closet floor. No creepie crawlies (whew!), but of course there was some dried up food in the back corners. My critters like to steal and hide food of all sorts when we are gone. There wasn't much as I've recently finally gotten in the habit of actually closing the closet door, but whatever was there was pretty unidentifiable. Thank goodness for a long reaching vacuum so I didn't have to get too close!

I had a slew of purses in there, and I was able to purge about half of them. Someone at Goodwill will be getting some nice deals on some nice handbags. I'm just shaking my head and wondering WHY I kept them for so long...so sure I would use them eventually. I was also able to condense my shoes a bit so I could fit in a basket of pants that had been sitting just outside of the closet.

Overall, this just adds to the sense of peace in our bedroom.

Our son actually dug in and made some real progress in his room. Still a long way to go, and hubby wanted to just keep going, but my son was feeling overwhelmed and needed a break. He and hubby tend to clash on this issue anyway. Son wants to do it himself; hubby wants to help (and son does need SOME help) but takes it so personally when son wants to at least start it himself. They did reach a compromise today, but I had to remind hubby that his room was as bad as our whole house had been and we had to do the house in small stages (and we're STILL struggling with the whole maintenance thing), so we couldn't expect too much from our son. We have all cleaned up his room in the past, but within days it would be back to where it was. Something has to be different this time...that definition of insanity, remember? Doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. SOMEthing has to be done differently!

Anyway, what was interesting to me was that one of the things he was most proud of was how much of his stuff that he got rid of! He actually got rid of old trophies, lots of stuffed animals, and of course some clothes. He seems to really like the feeling of freedom and peace it gives his room! I am proud of him! I am so surprised at the trophies, and a part of me wants to go get them back out. They were something he had been so proud of...but they WERE from quite a while ago, and he did keep a couple faves. He's got bigger goals to attain as he heads into junior high and high school. Maybe this frees him up to reach for those goals...no hindrances whatsoever, either mental or tangible. Good for him!

Early morning, tomorrow, so g'nite all!

Progress not Perfection, right?

Today was an interesting day.

I got a call to work today, but it was for a situation I had been in before, and to say it was horrific would be an understatement. Knowing that Thursdays are usually busy and I would probably get called again for something different, I turned it down. I didn't get called again. It weighed heavily on my mind most of the day. Supposedly, my sanity should be worth something...a day's pay? But when you live paycheck to paycheck...let's just say, I beat myself up pretty good for it. *sigh*

I was tired a good bit. I tried, really tried, to use the time off productively, but I felt like I had been drugged. I don't know if it was my health issues rearing their ugly head or what, but I ended up lying down to take a nap, praying that I would feel better when I woke up. Two hours and several weird dreams later, I did feel better physically, but not so much about how the day went.

I had a little bit of driving to do (errands to run) as usual, and I found myself really looking around at the fall weather and colors. Temps were dropping here today, pretty significantly, and it's amazing how, even from inside, one can just look and tell that it's much cooler...definitely fall. There's something different about the wind, the overcast sky, all of it, that is difficult to define. But the difference is there. I love fall...and I found myself absorbing all of this, and marveling at God's masterpiece here on earth. Cool weather often makes me grateful for things like shelter, electricity, warm blankets, and hot chocolate. So I took a moment in the car to thank God for these things.

Yesterday, I dozed off in our recliner and when I woke up, my feet were so cold they almost hurt. When I put on warm socks it was a tangible relief that could only be compared to putting salve and a bandage on a wound. Sometimes it's the little things, but I got to thinking about how many people don't have something as simple as a pair of socks.

As far as extracurricular activities go, this has been a fairly slow week for us. The break has been nice, but it would have been a great opportunity to get some other projects done or caught up. So why are we struggling so much to just maintain? It should be as easy as putting stuff away as you use it, taking a few minutes each evening to straighten up, and taking a few minutes to wash up the day's dishes rather than wait three weeks. But...it's just not that easy. And with each one or two things that we put off, five more pop up. I swear the dust bunnies are multiplying!

I have noticed how a few things have started to become routine. My bathroom remains clean, and after all my squawking about the bed, I find I notice it as soon as I come out of the bathroom in the morning. My daughter continues to make her bed and she swipes the sink most every morning. She also notices when the clutter is spreading and wants us to get a handle on it before it's too late. My son, on the other hand, is *ahem* a little less cooperative. He's not defiant, but forgetful, unmotivated, and unfocused. I am often the same way, especially in the forgetful category, so it's hard to remind him of things when I have trouble remembering my own list, let alone what I've asked him to do.

Solutions seem so simple to the cleanies...lists, notes, etc. Why are these so hard for us "squalorees" to utilize? Why is my brain so scattered? I've got enough faults as it is...this one just seems to magnify them all.

One thing I will clarify...to close on a hopeful, optimistic note... the maintaining we are struggling with has a LOT more to do with clutter rather than squalor. No rotting food in the sink (or frig), no dried-on ketchup smears on the counter, and no dried up pee around the toilet. In fact, this morning I had to listen to my daughter screech to my son to clean up his pee that he had sprayed all over the floor. He's supposed to be swiping that area every morning anyway, but often forgets. I guess it was so bad this time, she wasn't about to let him get away with it. Now, scattered clothes, dishes, and papers...those are the things I see when I look around.

Gotta close...gotta work tomorrow. Raising my glass of milk (I love milk!)....here's to a better tomorrow and a good weekend!

Accomplishments?

"List three accomplishments in order of priority that you have had that you feel will help with this job."

That was a question on a recent job application that I was filling out. Several weeks ago I was asked an almost identical question in an interview.

I hate this question. Still do. And lately it's been haunting me a bit.

The first thing that always comes to mind is my kids. I have two terrific kids, and I could absolutely burst with pride when I think or talk about them. I am a good mom. It's one of the few things (maybe the only thing) I have much self confidence in. I could talk about them for a long time.

But that's only one thing. What else can I say? It was especially hard in the interview because I was drawing a complete blank. So we sat there in silence while I was trying to come up with something. I'm sure that went over well...not.

Lately, I am so happy with the changes we've made in the house. We are rising out of squalor, and it hasn't been easy. In fact, we are having some trouble keeping up with some of the maintenance. There isn't the squalor like we've had...not even close. But there is clutter. It wouldn't take very long to quickly get it picked up for company, and that's a treat for us, but it's still not where I want to be. Anyway, I don't think "de-squaloring" would go over too well with a supervisor as an accomplishment in a job application.

I don't think I make a great wife. Several years after going through struggle after struggle...our own hell of sorts...I still have trouble giving what I know my husband needs. And not being able to do any sort of normal housekeeping until recently doesn't put me high on list of good, qualified wives, I'm sure.

I've volunteered for several ministries in our church, but guess how many of those have thrived and grown, especially because of what I've done? Ummm....let's see....counting the most recent one....that would be zero. (As in zip, zilch, zero, nada.)

I've had some jobs through my adult life, some part-time, some full-time, and some I've done well, and some not. But even with those that I've done well, there isn't anything I can claim as an "accomplishment."

I do like my current job; in fact, I like it a lot, and I'm pretty good at it. But it's one where I should be making a difference with people, and I don't think I am. I would love to hear from someone from the past that I actually made a dent in their life. Maybe I've been watching too many Hallmark movies.

I haven't posted in a while, and I don't like to be such a downer now, but I'm just struggling a bit tonite. *sigh*

I know God's grace is enough...oh, thank the Lord for that! But I'd like to be able to say I've served Him well, and I just don't think I have.

"Well done, good and faithful servant." Those words make me cry almost every time I read them because I don't think I'll ever hear them. And the tears are starting now, so before I make myself worse, I'm going to sign off.

A Squalor's Dictionary

There is a thread at the SOS forum titled "The SOS Dictionary." It has been fun reading some of these. It's been helpful, too, as I did wonder about some of them. I thought I'd post them here, so that if I use them, you'll know what I'm talking about. Even if I don't use them, they're fun to read. Enjoy.

• twirling - when you stand in a room, looking around and trying to figure out where to start, and you end up confused and overwhelmed, and you end up doing nothing.
• sink pudding - that gunk that fills your sink after a loooong time of not doing the dishes.
• ballet - the "dance" you do when you're navigating a path (see "goat trail") in your house and trying to avoid running into and tripping over things.
• goat trail - the path through your home when all other areas are impassable.
• Mt. Washmore - a huge pile of dirty laundry that needs to be done.
• Mt. Washedmore - a huge pile of clean clothes that need to be put away.
• amnesty - your official pardon from doing all the things like recycling that you think you MUST or SHOULD do in order to be a good person, but, as you continue to do them, or attempt to do them, you find they actually sabotage your efforts at having a safe and sane home. Therefore, you are granted amnesty from any thought or expectation that puts even one more tiny step between you and a healthy, happy, and junk-free home.
• the breeding grounds - where socks go to do the nasty & create hundreds of singlet socks with no match. (For example: Our socks tend to go completely sterile when they are actually in the laundry room - all socks have one mate & no offspring. Once they hit the couch after drying though, it's a free-for-all sock orgy & I can't tell you how many love-children have appeared after the wild sock festivals that go on in broad daylight on my couch. It's disgusting.)
• stacking - when all of the horizontal spaces are taken, you have to go vertical. Really tall "stacks" fall sometimes.
• frozen - when feeling overwhelmed, you can't do anything. Also known as paralysis.
• overwhelmed - what every single one of us was feeling when we stumbled upon SOS. (And yes, it still happens.)
• shop & drop - coming back from a shopping trip and dropping everything in the foyer, where it stays for several months.
• Mt. Fuji - a positive term to describe 3+ weeks' worth of pots & pans that have just been washed and are stacked up on the kitchen counter, air-drying.
• Churning - moving stuff from place to place without actually putting it away or finding a permanent home for it - or getting rid of it.
• Squober (I love this one!) - A play on the word "sober," a change in lifestyle and most importantly, a change in the way of thinking that leads to cleaning your way out of squalor and eventually into maintenance. Many of us are "clean and squober!"
• self squabotage - self sabotaging by putting too many steps or complications between yourself and getting stuff OUT of your home; coming up with seemingly legitimate reasons to hold onto things, sort through them, or finding other ways to keep them around longer.
• squabotage - unintentionally giving advice to others in the same vein.
• squinking - thinking that begins with........but i paid so much for xyz, or it was given to me by so and so, or i'll use it again some day, or i need it in case for xyz, or it's not "green" to just throw it out, or this is too good to just toss out/give away........pretty much any thought that pops into your head after you get the first inkling you ought to get something the heck out of your home instead of simply just getting rid of it.
• roominate - traveling from room to room in your home THINKING about all the stuff you intend to do.

I think what makes some of these fun is that there are actually terms for these things. Things that I have been doing and never realized how many others have been or are doing, too. They understand me. Much like an alcoholic or drug addict, while I am disgusted with my habits, I am relieved to know there are so many others who are walking this walk with me, and others who have made it and can verify that clean and squober is not an impossible goal.

Still working...

There are still so many areas that need work, but to have the house presentable so that I'm not embarrassed when someone comes is HUGE! Let's see....some areas that still need work:

• The microwave! Is it just me, or is this one of the quickest areas to get so very icky?! And while small, it's not the easiest thing in the world to clean. I hate cleaning it out. And the area around it gets pretty nasty, too.
• The kitchen cupboards need a good spring cleaning (too bad it's fall...guess those will have to wait a while! -- kidding, kidding, really.)
• The laundry room and pantry (they are connected). I have not been doing a great job with defending it from when dd cleaned it a couple weeks ago. They are small areas, and one litterbox is in there. So between the smell and the clutter, it's not easy to keep up with.
• The dining room table and our new desk. The table had been serving as a desk for quite a while, so I'm trying to get the mounds of paperwork sorted and onto on in the new desk area. I have some pretty good motivation here as we downsized to a smaller table for our dining room, but I have to get the older bigger one cleaned off before we can move the new smaller one in. I like this new one. It's new to us. We got it off of craigslist. We are going to sell our old one. I'm anxious to get rid of it and get the new one in there, so I've been puttering away at the paperwork the past few days.
• My son's room!! I don't even want to think about this one. His room is as bad as the entire rest of the house was when we started this journey. We have been trying to encourage him to do what we've done and find an area to clean and defend, but no results as of yet. We're going to just have to force that issue, but I am SO not ready for that yet. We'll get there. At least I can close the door to company for now.
• Get clothes put away from the living room into my closet. I should be able to do this today if I remember to pick up hangers at my mom's house. She told me she has hangers galore that she can give me...yay!
• Our basement still needs some work, although right now it probably looks like a lot of normal basements look....clutter, unfinished projects, and my craft corner that needs a lot of work.
• Our garage needs a lot of work, but that would be hubby's project. We have gotten a lot out of there, including a lot of garbage and trash that had been piling up...but there is still a LOT to be done!

There are others I'm probably missing right now, but that's certainly enough. Most of these areas are "hidden," so I'm going to make sure that I'm defending the current areas before moving on, and I'll probably take my time, as I already find the daily maintenance a good bit harder to keep up with now since we got all the main areas done. Back to work now. I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

Quote of the century!

"I don't mind doing it because the rooms are already clean."

I was lying in bed (it's Saturday; I was sleeping in, give me a break), when I heard this quote from my daughter just outside my room. I sat straight up and shook my head to make sure I wasn't dreaming. Pinch me, please. On second thought, don't. If I am dreaming, I don't want to wake up! But I wasn't dreaming. She was talking to her brother about vacuuming...! Another miracle in the Boda Climb to Clean Project. Wow.

Actually, you need to divide the sentence to realize that it's actually a double miracle. "I don't mind doing it..." To hear that from either one of my kids about cleaning is incredible. If you read my earlier posts, you know that this hasn't been a smooth journey when dealing with my family. Now, she did have her own motivation as she is expecting company later this afternoon, but she pulled out the vacuum and glass cleaner (!) and got to work without even a whimper of complaint.

Then there's the second part, "...the rooms are already clean." I NEVER thought I'd hear that about MY house. "The rooms are already clean." Do you know what it's like to hear that...and to know it's TRUE??! Most people do. This was a first for me. The only exception is our dining room table, but it's got stacks of papers that I need to sort through...quite different from the areas of trash and filth we've been cleaning. Now, the house is not perfect; it looks lived in, but it's a bit of clutter, not grime, filth, and dirt. For most people, this is normal...for me, it's pristine!

"Cleanliness is next to godliness." I hate that phrase! Because godliness involves so much more than cleanliness, so I think it underscores the importance of being godly in such an ungodly world. It's kind of like the overuse of the word "awesome." BUT, cleanliness does bring some peace, and for us in the world of squalor, it brings a sense of accomplishment like most people don't understand. (I named this "Climb to Clean for a reason!) Well, actually that's probably not fair...most people have different reasons for feeling a wonderful sense of accomplishment, but it's not usually from a clean house. :)

Our bedroom...a new place of peace

Another Oasis created!

I had the day off (sort of), and the kids had off school, so I finally got to my side of our bedroom. Since my hubby cleaned his side and has kept it pretty clean, that means the whole bedroom is now a sanctuary. I don't know why I haven't been wanting to do it, but I'm glad it's done now. I can't say that I was in the mood for doing it even today, but I wasn't as against it as usual, so I just started. Motivation does follow action, most of the time, and this time it worked. Once I got started, I really wanted to finish. I moved at a slow but steady pace, and for once, I didn't get overheated or overtired. It helped having little on our schedule today, so I could focus. It also helped that this wasn't part of a crisis cleaning. I've done plenty of those (usually when I was expecting company), and they usually end up badly...I procrastinate and don't get done nearly what I want to, and I'm rushing around when the company arrives...I'm flustered, way behind, and embarrassed.

Now, I've got lots of clothes out in the living room that need to be put away. I've been waiting until the bedroom was done before bringing them in. Smart choice for me, but let's see how long it takes me to get them put away. I need to pick up hangers...I'm always short of hangers...always.

Now, to change the subject a little bit. I've been thinking about the words "defend" and "maintain." I noticed at the SOS site that when talking about maintaining areas, the word "defend" is actually used. I really liked that, and I think I understand why. I think it shows a proactive approach. It seems to be more of an action verb than "maintain." I played sports in high school and know the importance of a good defense. It's every bit as important as the offense. One cannot survive without the other. "Maintain" sounds easy...too easy. "Defend" gives a better idea as to how hard this is for some of us...not impossible, but not easy either.

Just some thoughts for the evening...

G'nite all...

I Believe...

I believe I am

a unique and precious human being

my own best friend

and my own worst enemy

a lovable and loving person

capable of realizing my potential

self respecting

responsible for my own behavior

learning from my mistakes

creating a joyful life

an important part of the universe.

I read this on a poster shortly after the "intervention." I have always struggled with my self esteem, but I had been at an all-time low lately. I needed to read this, and I wrote it down so I could say it to myself often...often enough that hopefully someday I'll believe it.

Delight in the Fall

The leaves were especially beautiful today. Even my daughter commented that the view from her school (it overlooks a state park and a lake) was especially pretty with the leaves today.

Today was an incredibly busy day (quick rundown...work, daughter had home game, son had away game, I had to ref, hubby had to work second PT job...!), and in order to get everything accomplished, I, of course, had to do a lot of driving. Usually I get tired of driving around so much, but today, where I had to go took me through some really pretty areas with leaves that were bright red, deep gold, and a rich orange in colors. Some of them took my breath away...just gorgeous! I was thinking about how much I love fall and how I was looking forward to decorating for it next year (see my post a couple weeks ago about that), when I realized how my decorations are so pale in comparison to God's natural beauty outside and all around. A friend of my family's said that autumn is like God painting in slow motion. What a beautiful way to think of fall!

It really lifted my spirits to be out and about in such beauty.

Coming home to a relatively clean house (big parts of it, anyway) certainly helped too. We didn't have time for anything but defending our currently clean areas, but I knew that going into today, so I felt pretty good about it. Our schedules aren't going to settle down for some time, so we have to be able to go with the flow. Maintaining is such progress for us! Knowing that we can do that much on a day like today means a lot to me. It means that when we do reach the stage where most of the house is clean most of the time, we WILL be able to keep up with it.

Another busy day tomorrow...not as busy as today, but still busy. Then, the kids get a couple days off of school. Hopefully we can make some progress over those days.

I love Jesus. I love my family. I like my job. I love my hubby. I am starting to believe I could maybe have that abundant life Jesus promised that has always felt so out-of-reach for me.

Cobwebs, Be Gone!

Lots of kudos to give out today...

We got a lot accomplished the past couple days. First of all, our "formal" living room (Is there such a thing as a formal living room when living in squalor??) has been cleaned up...vacuumed, dusted, the whole nine yards. My son did this, and while he didn't do a perfect job, he didn't do too bad at all. This shouldn't be too hard to defend (maintain) as we don't spend a lot of time there. It's nice because that's where the front door opens into, so at least the first impression will be good. Now, my dining room which is the second place most people see is still a wreck, but I'm here to talk about progress...

We bought a desk for our family room to take the place of a computer armoir that we recently sold. The desk is bigger than I thought it would be, but I still really like it. It motivated us to move some furniture around, and in doing so, we pulled out the vacuum. I was delighted with my family's attitude. When my daughter and I started the process, I thought we would do the bare minimum and work on the rest this week, but she pulled out the vacuum, I started moving furniture, and we were off and running! While we had the vacuum out, I suggested getting some nasty cobwebs out of the one corner. We couldn't reach, so we hollered for my hubby to come help. He got those cobwebs and then started around the room. Ugh...there were a lot more than I realized! But I think we got them all. And it was actually kind of fun going around and sucking up those dirty old webs. Hmmm...I'm thinking now maybe I should have left them there for Halloween...? ...Nah. :P

We also vacuumed off the ceiling fan. Could someone tell me what it is about ceiling fans that they collect so much gunk?! (Yes, that is the scientific name for it..."gunk." A cross-species of gross, junk, goo, and grodies. Ick!) Anyway, we got the family room floor cleaned up, and we dusted the furniture and pictures. I swear, some of the stuff could have been accessories to a haunted house...dust and cobwebs galore! The coffee table still needs to be cleaned off. That's an area like my kitchen island that draws clutter, papers, and even dirty dishes like nowhere else. It will take a while to get that maintained on a regular basis. But to keep my sanity, I'm going to focus on defending the floor for now. Between the living room and the family room floor, those are enough new areas to maintain this week. We have another crazy week ahead, especially the beginning half.

What made me smile through most of the progress we made is my family's attitude. So much better than a couple weeks ago! Maybe I caught them on a good day; maybe they're enjoying the other clean areas, so they're willing to pitch in a little better. I don't know. But I do know I was incredibly grateful for it today. A productive weekend...even with attending a wedding yesterday!

Now...the work week grind begins in a just a few hours. G'nite, all!

Trash Maneuvers

I found this on my favorite web site (SOS), and I was practically in tears at the end from laughing so hard. I could have written this...this is exactly how I've thought, and actually can still find myself falling back into these old habits way too easily. Read and enjoy!

The trash maneuvers: What are the trash maneuvers? They are a complicated set of thoughts and actions, related to circling around a trash bin instead of taking it out. You see, it is just too hard to take the trash out when the bin is full, so a set of complicated maneuvers is required to avoid this TEDIOUS, tedious task. It goes like this:

Step 1. Observe the trash bin. Make a mental note: "Hey, the bin is full. Crap." Solution: simply use some force to fit your trash in the bin. You will be surprised at the huge amount of trash you can actually fit into a small bin when you really work for it!

Step 2. When no amount of force helps, and the bin is just too full, locate a suitable spot somewhere, and simply leave your trash there. Remember, it takes too much effort to just take the trash bag out of the bin and take it outside!

Step 3. Every time you go to the kitchen, take some time to be bothered about the trash. Thoughts like these help: "Uh-oh, it's full. Ugh, it smells in here." When you need to throw something away, think, "What should I do about this piece of trash? Yeah, I'll just leave it on the counter - No wait, there's already too much trash on it - Well, I'll just throw it in the sink, the sink smells already anyway. It's too much trouble to take the trash out."

Step 4. When you are finally just too fed up with all the trash surrounding you, or if the smell makes it hard to breathe in the kitchen, or if the in-laws are threatening to visit you, it is time to finally take the trash out. Take the bag out of the bin and put it somewhere you remember to take it out: the front door, for example.

Step 5. Every time you go out, make a mental note about the trash bag blocking your way to the front door. Make another mental note, reminding yourself you're too busy to take it out. Step or jump over the bag. Repeat this step for as long as you wish or endure. Some have been doing this for days, weeks, months, maybe even years! Remember to be very bothered about the trash bag sitting at your front door or hallway (or kitchen or living room if your'e really hardcore), but remind yourself it's too tedious to take it out with you. You are too busy for that. And remember, Busy People are Important People.

Step 6. This step is performed in the kitchen, in parallel with Step 5. Multitasking, you see! You could spend a few seconds taking another trash bag (you probably have collected a 100 years' worth of these already) and putting it in the bin. STOP! Don't do that! Those few seconds take too much of your Precious Time!

Step 7. Maintain Step 6. Every time you need to throw some trash in the bin, make a mental note: "Uh-oh, there's no bag in there, I can't put this thing in the bin," and just leave it on a vacant spot in the kitchen. Repeat this step until you feel ready to actually put the bag in the bin.

Step 8. Cleaning frenzy! You're fed up with the situation and finally have put the bag in the bin! Now it's time to take advantage of a usable trash bin, so collect all the trash in the kitchen (in the sink, on the counters, table, floor, wherever it is) and throw it in the bin!

Step 9. Observe the bin. It is now full.

Step 10. Go to step 1 and repeat.

YES. I've actually been behaving like this, many times. I won't bother taking the trash out because spending those two minutes to take it out would be too much trouble. BUT, apparently, it is not too much trouble to spend several minutes, maybe hours in total, watching the counters and sink get covered in trash, worrying about it, moving it around when I cook, and taking the time to wonder, with each piece of new trash, where to put it. To my delight, however, I've been getting out of this habit. I have realized how utterly stupid it is to take all the time worrying about trash, when you could really just "waste" a couple of minutes of your precious time to take the trash out when the bin is full and put another bag in the bin. Yes, I've definitely made progress here and it really makes a difference!

Walls

I hit a wall. A brick wall. Not a literal wall, but a wall of exhaustion that felt like a brick wall. Our schedules are incredibly busy, every single day. Wednesdays are usually the least busy, so I always try to add at least one more area of clean on Wednesdays, even if it's a small area. But, I had a bit of a rough day at work yesterday, and then had some running around to do afterward. I was pretty whipped when I got home, but I did manage to make some supper. I was so hungry, and it tasted so good...so that was a wonderful reprieve in the day. Shortly after that, though is when I hit that wall. What is frustrating is that I kept dozing off and on in our recliner, but talk about strange dreams! Weird. And not at all restful. I was probably snoring, too (I usually do).

I had plans to progress further forward in my cleaning projects. As I said, Wednesdays are usually pretty quiet...the kids don't have practices or games, and we had an evening at home, but that wall was just totally insurmountable. I had assigned my kids their projects, and much to their credit, they did accomplish them. On top of that, my hubby made sure they got the maintenance areas in the kitchen done, so by the time we went to bed, the counters were clean and the dishes were done. They weren't done perfectly, but they were done, and I can live with that. The fact that they were done at all tells me that we are getting the hang of this maintenance thing. In the past, we would have let it go, telling ourselves (lying to ourselves, really), that since it wasn't too bad, we'd get to it the next day. This time, my kids and hubby, "sucked it up" and just did it (while I snored ever so gently in the recliner. And I am so proud of them! (I HEARD that choking--or was it guffawing?--about my gentle snoring...)

On an even more positive note, on Tuesday evening, both kids commented out loud about how nice it was that we were maintaining the kitchen. I think, like me, they are seeing that this is do-able, and if we keep adding things at a reasonable pace, we will eventually have a house where people can drop in without the fear of God running through our veins when we hear a knock at the door. You know how it is, when your friend calls wanting to drop something off, and you panic...it's raining out, so you can't meet them outside, so...you race through the house picking up whatever you possibly can, throw it in the bedroom, slam the door. Then, you race through the house spraying air freshener, hoping that gives an illusion of clean (we all know it doesn't work, but we try anyway). And my house is laid out in such a way that I keep them trapped at the front door, practically spinning them on their heels, saying "Thanx so much, and I'd invite you in, but I can't right now," and shoo them back out into the rain. Yeah, that would be me...the hostess with the mostest. :p

Good to know that changes are in process...

I Made My Bed Today!

This makes me laugh. I have been planning and thinking about this blog for days...I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it (in my head until now).

It's been months and possibly even years since I've made my bed. Now, believe it or not, we have always been able to sleep in our bed...it has not been covered with junk/stuff/clothes/whatever for more than a day. (Now, the floor is a different story, but we won't go there today.) For most people -- from average housekeepers to OCD cleanies -- making the bed is a pretty basic thing taught from the time one is a toddler. But for me, it's just never been a priority. And to some extent, it still isn't at the top of my list. I mean, come on, you're just gonna get back in it in about 16 hours, it's easy to close a bedroom door to the outside, and it doesn't hinder anything else by letting it go. It is strictly an aesthetically pleasing chore. Even if you use the bed, like I do, to fold and sort laundry before putting it away, it's not hard to toss aside the covers and carry on. Making the bed doesn't make that any easier to do. Think about it...the kitchen counters look nice when they're clean, but mainly they become much more functional. The floors...much easier to walk through and work on. Even dusting, which helps things look nice also serves a purpose in that it keeps the dirt and dust that we breathe in to a minimum. But making the bed...? Well....you get the idea.

Even my daughter and husband think of making the bed as part of the basics. My daughter, ON HER OWN, has been making her bed every morning for at least a couple of years. And at the very beginning of this journey, when we were discussing things we would shoot for to do on a daily basis, my husband mentioned making the bed. He even volunteered to fold his covers and set them aside, since we have separate covers (I am a notorious cover hog, plus I toss and turn, practically doing gymnastics in bed, so we have separate covers). My cover is a nice comforter that can serve as a bed spread, too. I told hubby it would have to be pretty simple at first (and maybe always): spread out the comforter, throw on some nice pillow shams, and toss the pillows at the head of the bed. Anything more than that, and I'll fade out of that habit pretty quickly.

I fell into that perfectionism mode a little bit in that I wanted to change the linens before I started making the bed. I did that a while ago, but kept forgetting to make the bed. It's not part of my routine, and since I'm not a morning person, I kept walking by it in a daze every morning. Today, for the first time in a while, I had the opportunity to sleep in (only had to go to work for half a day...the second half), and when I woke up, I noticed hubby's covers all folded up. I wondered how long he had been doing that hoping I would get around to making the bed...? Anyway...I actually made the bed today!

Something else I had forgotten was how much fun our one cat is when I make the bed. She thinks my shaking and spreading out the comforter is an invitation to play. She goes a little nuts chasing the edges and corners and this morning ended up playing with her own tail long after I finished. In the past, she would sometimes start off under the cover, so I would just let it fall on top of her. I would then place bets in my head as to how long it would take her to get out. And I love how, in situations like that, cats try to leave and carry on with some dignity. So hopefully, I'll remember to make the bed from here on out, and I'll get some entertainment in the morning...when I most need it! But since you know it's not at the top of my list...if I miss it here and there...well...have some patience...! :)

Applause for a supportive hubby...

The back of our basement was an absolute disgusting mess. The dog had been using it as her litterbox (yeah, I know dogs don't use litterboxes, but you get the idea) over and over...and over again. There were boxes, a desk, a table, and other misc. stuff around, so we never seemed to get it cleaned up well. It was hard to stay back there long enough to even get the worst of it cleaned up as the stench was positively nauseating. It permeated the entire basement, but going to the back was hard to do without literally heaving and wretching.

I give our whole family kudos a couple weeks ago for tolerating it enough to start throwing out a lot of "stuff." (A dump truck's worth, if you remember.) Some of my extended family was there, and we tried to make light of the situation and the odor, but I think we all could have benefited from gas masks! But getting that load of stuff gone was key to my husband's next move that he made yesterday.

He cleared the entire area, cleaned up the floor as best he could, then painted the floor with Kilz. That stuff is fantastic! And it worked. Our basement smells normal. After he finished, I was able to go back and sort through most of the boxes that were back there and put the keeper stuff in plastic totes. We are in the process of putting most everything into plastic totes. Basements tend to be damp anyway, but our one corner has some serious water issues that we need to work on, but in the meantime, those plastic totes will keep things safe. I can also see through most of them, so I know what's inside.

I'm rattling...I really am going somewhere with this...

My daughter had to go downstairs to get something out of our extra freezer, and she was practically writing cheers all the way down and back up again about how wonderful it was that the basement smelled normal...she could walk back to the back without worrying about dog pooh...and she could breathe deeply the whole way. It was almost comical how big a deal she was making of it! But I was so glad because my hubby is one who needs almost constant affirmation. I hope he was listening and absorbing the whole thing. He really does deserve some props for taking on that project. Honestly in all the de-squaloring we do, this may be the one single thing that makes the biggest difference. It may be a toss-up between that and the vinyl bathroom floor. That bathroom floor got rid of the worst of the smell upstairs, got rid of that gross carpet, and helped motivate me to keep that bathroom clean and let the clean grow from there. The basement floor got rid of the smell downstairs (which was actually much worse than upstairs) and feels like it will be a motivation to organize and grow the clean downstairs. And I can use my craft corner now!! (Well, that area needs some serious work with organization, but it's do-able, and I love making gifts, so with the holiday season fast approaching, I've got some great motivation.) So, if you see my hubby in the near future, please give him a big hug and tell him his wife thinks he's pretty terrific.

Thoughts for my next areas to work on: the kitchen is the most used room in the house, so the more I work on it, the more functional it becomes, so I'm going to keep working at that. The microwave area isn't too bad, but it does need a good scrubbing and then it will be easier to maintain. Much like the microwave, the stove is not bad, but it's not great either. My problem is that I'm dreading tearing apart the door so I can get to the nasty stuff under the handle. Oh yeah, it's nasty, and I've tried everything under the sun to get to it. It's just going to have to be torn apart. I've looked at it, and I think it's do-able, but it's not gonna be fun. And the last thing (I think) in the kitchen is the cupboards. Most aren't too bad, but they could all use a good spring cleaning and sorting, and a couple of them are kind of icky. I think that covers the kitchen.

I think the next big area I will try to get done in the next couple days is the living room. It's a fairly easy one to clean and maintain as we don't spend a lot of time in there. It's also where the front door enters into, so it's nice to have it cleaned up for a decent first impression.

I could continue...but I won't. I'll overwhelm myself. But it's exciting to be able to grow something! I have such a black thumb...but now I can tell myself I can't grow plants, but I can grow clean...!!! Hahahahaha...

Now, to find some extra energy...anyone have any to spare? :)

Footloose and Fancy Free in the Kitchen

Once again, I was on one of my favorite web sites (Stepping Out of Squalor...SOS) when I read something that really resonated with me. Believe it or not, there is a streak of perfectionism in us "squalorees." That probably surprises you. See, we feel like when we do something (esp. house cleaning), we need to do it ALL and do it WELL...even perfectly. If we can't do it--no time, too overwhelmed, whatever--then we don't do ANYthing. Even doing something like picking up the obvious trash is too small a task if we can't get it all done. I mean doing that will lead to the next glaring layer of grime, and if I can't get to it, then why should I even start? I know this is ridiculous to the "cleanies" out there, but it is our warped way of thinking. Crazy, huh? Yeah, I know. But it is exactly how I tend to think.

I found myself falling into that trap even recently. As you know, I've been working on small areas to clean and then maintain. That means that other areas still show no signs of improvement. I'm fine with that because the clean is growing...someday, not too far in the future, clean WILL win. But those other areas can still be pretty bad. I'll find myself wanting to deal with part of it...but my old way of thinking rears its ugly head. I'm thinking, oh, I will be getting to that, and I'll be cleaning it up and maintaining it, too (cause I've seen recently that I AM capable of that), so instead of picking up those few things that are bothering me, or really getting in the way of our day-to-day living, I just let them go, or keep walking by it.

The other day, I was talking to myself (not out loud, thankfully...I've got enough issues that this could be the one to bring the guys with straight jackets to my house to carry me away! :p), and I found myself giving myself a good lecture. I was in the family room -- the room that gets the most use in our house. And I was saying to myself, "DUH! Just because I can't clean it ALL up right now and keep up with it, doesn't mean I have to let EVERYthing go. Umm...how stupid is that?" So I picked up a few obvious things, asked the kids to do the same, and in just a few minutes, we got to the point where we could actually walk on the floor and sit on the couch without stepping or sitting on clothes, papers, etc. Still have a LONG way to go, and none of us currently has the motivation or time to get it where it needs to be...but (and this is important) THAT's OKAY! There IS progress...it does NOT HAVE TO BE perfect progress.

Before, I go, I have one more thing to share. Last night when I came upstairs from the computer to our kitchen, I took my shoes off and walked across the kitchen to the frig to get something to drink. Now, first of all, the fact that I COULD walk across in my bare feet is a minor miracle itself. The fact that I did it and didn't step on any crumbs, stickies, or ickies is a major miracle in this house. I was thinking, "Hey, we did this! We mopped three days ago (or was it four?), and we've managed to maintain it enough so that I can walk across and not have to immediately go wash my feet or socks." ***Happy dance!***

Well, now I've got some laundry to do and a few things to put away to maintain the maintaining. :D

TTFN

Popping zits and tempers

I haven't posted for a little while. I've wanted to, but I've been crazy busy, mostly with work. I don't have access to a computer most days at work, which is a real pain, but I'm not here to talk about that, so before I get off on that tagent...

You know the zit that you love to pop...the one with a head as white as your teeth...the one that you barely squeeze and it spurts onto the mirror...? Gotta love those. Well, unfortunately, that's how I was with my temper the other day. I think the majority of it was dealing with the kids' attitudes recently. I had HAD it! I was tired of the arguing, the eye rolls, the sighs, the stomping, and even some passive aggressive behavior from both of them. So, I was a crab, and I felt absolutely ready to POP! My spirit was stretched to the limit. Even my husband was trying to calm me down (until he heard about what I had been dealing with, and then he sat the kids down and had a "talk" with them). I hate being like that, and once hubby called me on the carpet for it, I diffused pretty quickly. We survived the evening, but I can't say that it will be added to our list of Hallmark memories.

I apologized to the kids the next day, and I have noticed a difference, especially in my daughter. I saw a quote from someone that made me laugh out loud and lighten my mood considerably... "Ah, family...can't live with them. Not enough space to bury the dead bodies...!"

I got a few groceries today, and how nice it was to have counters cleaned off to put them on when unloading the car. We got them put away right away and still have those clean counters! :) I also was able to fold laundry on my clean kitchen table. Got that put away quickly too.

Hubby painted the other side of the basement with Kilz. That's where the dog (and cats) have been the WORST with relieving themselves. Can't tell you how much better it smells down here. *Doing the major happy dance!!!* Now, we have to remember to keep that door closed so they don't start reusing it. UGH!

I am in the process of putting Christmas stuff into plastic totes rather than boxes. It really does feel good to get some of this stuff done. Yay!!!!

Inch by inch...